Worst. Day. Ever.

I am a recovering addict and alcoholic. I say that so you’ll understand why the rest of this story is pissing me off so badly. I was sober for 10 hard years, then I relapsed, and then I had a few years and relapsed again, and I couldn’t manage to get my shit together until last February 20. This month I will be clean and sober for one year.

I go to therapy twice a week, and one of the things they make you do is pee in a cup for drug tests. I never worry, because the only thing in my system is prescribed by my doctor and he works at the same clinic.

So imagine my surprise when my counselor called me into his office, shut the door, and told me that my urine had come back positive for fentanyl and methamphetamine.

Wait, what?

I’m also on Suboxone, and I don’t want a debate on replacement therapy. I’m just telling you this because Suboxone has an opiate blocker in it, so I could shoot 100 bags of fentanyl and heroin and do nothing but overdose and die. Why would I take an opiate when I’m on an opiate blocker and my levels for the blocker were consistent? Asshole.

As for methamphetamine, I don’t even know where to start finding meth on Long Island.

I’m really pissed, and hurt. My counselor just gave me one of those, “Tell the truth now” looks. I told him I want the urine retested and I took another test again.

Other people that go to my program have mentioned that their tox screens have come back positive when they haven’t done anything. I say they should start using another lab.

Okay, vent over.

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2 thoughts on “Worst. Day. Ever.

  1. Glad you can vent here and let someone else own the issue. You have put too much time in to recovery to let flawed science, or people, matter.

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